Saturday, February 18, 2006

was lost and was found

We had just arrived in our humble home in our ever splendid province: Laguna. I've arrived there with my mom and my cousin to enjoy the weekend; too bad my younger brother and sister haven't able to come with us for some reason. You might wonder where my father is: he'd been always there in Laguna beacause his work was there, and staying with him was my calm and good grandmother. Everytime im free and have nothing to do in manila I go in our home in the province to enjoy the fresh air, the somewhat more suitable climate there and, not to forget, the pleasing company of my father and grandmother.

I had arrived there haven't gotten the slightest idea of an unexpected incident, which will make me realize some things, that would happen later that day.

It was already half an hour passed midnight. Everything's calm and peacefull. I was in our living room sitting on the side of our sofa, with my grandmother on the otherside, and was wacthing the midnight news; I dont exactly know if my grandmothers watching too. Usually, my grandmother, and I know yours too, always sleeps early. But, this time she's waiting for my cousin--an 18 year old "pasaway" girl-- who had not yet returned home since she'd left that afternoon. Earlier that day, my cousin had told to my mom that she'll just go out for a couple of hours and asked if she could bring the pick-up truck with her. My mom told her that she'll let her drive the truck if grandma agreed. So my cousin had asked my grandma and was successfull getting her approval. Now, clocks are nearly striking one and, still, my cousin wasn't home. My grandmother, as i've observed, was beggining to be worried and was also beggining to be somewhat angry. I looked at my grandmother and saw tension on her face, sweat's already bursting on her forehead, her wrinkles, which seemed always relaxed, now is beggining to look brute on her face. With my grandmother in this kind of condition, my cousin, im very sure of this, now is in big trouble.

My cousin came back home passed one and was warmly welcomed by our grandmother with a sharp, furious and freezing stare(teka, parang mali noh? warmly tapos freezing?). The moment my cousin walked right before the sofa where me and my grandma were sitting, granny, suddenly, stood so fast that my cousin had stepped back in surprize. Then with a blink of an eye, without warning, and as i've anticipated, my grandma immediately and sorely, with a very loud voice, scolded my cousin. At that time i'm still sitting on our sofa watching documentary program. Emotions bursted and exploded on my grandmas mouth and hands. I believe that was the first time I saw my grandma exploded with passionately indignant feelings. She'd thrown out, with unbearable passion, illicit and vicious words to my cousin which, I think, was very hard to take. Her hands swayed and flew in all directions, some of it hitted my cousins face. The time I saw her exploded like this I thought I lost my calm and good grandma. Her voice was so loud that my mom had awakened from her sleep and had immidiately came out of her room and saw the predicament my cousin is in to. My mom immediately interfered with my grandmas emotional outburst and hurriedly calmed her down. And as my grandmas tension taper, and as my cousin immediately went in her room, the calm and good grandma, which I knew, was slowly coming back to life.

I think every person, how long their patience are, has their limits. And as i've seen and realized, a person, even the ones who you thought you completely knew, could look like somebody else when they've reached their limits.

But actually my grandmothers patience, which you might thought was the thing i'm reffering in my topic, was not really what was lost and was found.

After the short incident in our living room and after my mom had succesfully calmed my grandmother down I went straight in my room. A couple of days ago, because I have no new books to read (wala kasi ko budget ngayon pambili bago book. hehe..) i've, again, started reading Harper Lee's "To Kill A Mockingbird". So as i've entered my room I went straight in my bed and, seemed automatic, grabed Lee's novel beneath my pillows and started reading. A moment had passed, I was already lost in the book I was reading when my grandmother's voice, loud enough for me to hear in my room, had said something strange.

"Vic," vic was my dad's nickname. "si bogart nakasunod sa likod mo, baka makalabas." my grandma said loudly but without shouting.

I don't know, but the moment I'd heard this I felt suddenly worried and abruptly went out of my room to see what's happening. When i've reached our living room I saw that granny's still there and was alone; my mom must have had continued her sleep. I asked granny what the matter is and has told me that bogart, our pitbull, might have gotten out on the streets because it was following my dad when he went out. My dad went out, as i've asked later, to park the car in front of the garage gate; he haven't had parked it ealier because he too was waiting for my cousin to first park the pick-up truck in the garage. I then went out to check if our dog was still there. So I went in the area near the garage and called bogart. Normally, our pitbull, with my call, immediately responds. But when I called Bogart that time, the only one who responded was Borgy--our shih-tzu. I've called Bogart for a minute or so, but there's no sign of him. I've then begun to look here and there and everywhere and, still, no sign of him. My grandma, still inside the house, then shouted and instructed me to check the front gate. As I went toward the gate something had suddenly troubled me, I've begun anticipating negative things, my fingers,then, begun to shake, and my heart had started to pound. When I've reached the gate I instantly knew why i'd suddenly felt worried: the gate was hanging open. When I saw the gate hanging open my worries had just grew and automatically I told myself "SHET! nakalabas si bogart!!!! baka di na namin makita yun." I went immediately outside and saw the car already parked infront of the garage gate. I looked the right side of the street and saw it empty and then the left and saw, weirdly, my dad talking to someone. I went straight to him, excused him from his buddy and asked if he has seen Bogart outside. (I've asked my dad, later that night, who he was talking to, he has told me that it was an old friend he had just accidentally bumped into that night.) He told me that he hasn't noticed Bogart and asked what the matter is. I told him that Bogart wasn't inside the house and might now be roaming around the streets. After my dad heard this he completely excused himself with his friend and said bye. We then, again, went inside our house and called Bogart. When my dad was convinced that Bogart was not there he begun to be worried.

"don," nickname ko sa bahay ang don. "bakit mo naman hindi tinitingnan si bogart." He asked me with worried exression.
"nasa kuwarto ko po ko eh, narinig ko lang po kay mama na nakasunod daw po sa'nyo si Bogart."
"di ko naman cya napansin nung lumabas ako." my dad said.

I could see the sadness on my dad's face.

"tara po, hanapin natin sa labas." I'd said.

We then, again, went outside the streets to search for Bogart. When we've gotten out, my dad went left and instructed me to search the other direction. When i've walked about 10meters away on our house, I saw, about 20 meters away, on the street perpendicular to the one i'm walking a familiar dog that had just popped-out under a parked big truck. I squinted and look carefully the familiar dog and saw that is was Bogart. I was about to shout out our dog's name when I've remembered that hes scared of shouts and might run if he heard me shouting. So I just clapped my hands to call his attention. The time I successfully called his attention he just stared at me; might be wondering who I am. I then knelt down on the street, Bogart must have recognize me for he just suddenly and carelessly ran toward my direction. All my worries faded away. The time I've grasped the belt-like thing in his neck I instantly called my dad whose still not that distant from where I am.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

dying to live

You're blinded, you're dazzled
with it your mind is centered
you're obsessed, you're longing
for the money they're giving

Is it worth fighting?
I can see your strugling
now you loved ones are crying
out there you're lifelessly lying

For your family you've died
for your dream you're willing to fight
hope became your guide
but, sadly, fate wasn't on your side

Life isn't worth a piece of ticket. But if hope lies inside a ticket, which is whats inside the wowowee ticket, people, who's desperate enough, will surely do anything, even stepping on our fragile and weak countrymen, just to have one.

What had happened on the ultra was a clear display of how desperate filipinos now are. That even their own conscience, which I know they have, have'nt been able to stop them from doing the unjust and unfair things they had done.

The people had died anticipating that they'll gonna get a piece of ticket, they had died expecting to win; this fact trully makes me sad.

Is this what poverty, or should I say money, could make? Is this how desperate filipinos are? Could hope be only found on gameshows?

Thursday, February 02, 2006

because its february

t at dahil malapit na ang araw ng mga puso. Eto, isang tula ginawa ko. Wala pa nga pla title, wala pa ko maiisip eh.

I have been always alone
In this dismal place surrounded by bone
For me, it seems to me more like a cage than a home
I surely want to be free, and by the wind be blown

Everything around me were all shaded with black
world inside here, its so cold, its so sad
Amid this dreary, huge, black walls surrounding me
There's nothing you would wish for, but to leave and be free

But what can I do? I know I can't be free
Because like everybody else, you needed me indispensably
It's typical that without me you'll die instantly
That's why I have to face it, I'll be stuck here for eternity

So as I open my eyes to this kind of grave reality
I can't help it, and would always found myself in agony
I wouldn't be suprize if one day i'll go crazy
I think I can't face it, help me, i'm suffering in great misery

But then, suddenly, one day everything has changed
I haven't noticed it, but this place now's no longer a cage
The huge dark walls now are all starting to sink
Then light glowered brightly much faster that a blink
Instantly i've begun to see a great spacious paradisiacal meadow!
Wait! there's something up there,
oh yes!
there's a glorious rainbow
Picasso and Van Gogh's paintings had abruptly appeared out of no where
Butterflies sweetly flying and flowers begun to sprung everywhere
Birds alighted in the trees and started singing delightfully
Then music suddenly filled the air with pleasing harmony
Colors are now flashing energetically here and there
Believe me, all this had happened at the very moment you've laid your eyes on her

The ethereal warmth of the sun now I can finally feel
It's pouring down on me like drizzle falling on the calm summer sea
Now i've realized I don't want to leave and be free
Although i'm stuck here,
I can now lucidly feel the sweet caress of liberty

With this kind of uplifting feeling
There's only one possible thing I'm now thinking
And now everythings seemed obviously happening
My friend, with her, im sure your falling

Everythings so bright, everythings so light
If I could only just talk to her, i'll thank her for making feel like a kite
I've felt by the wind I've been upliftedly blown
And this place now I consider my eternal home

But what the hell are you doing?
It seems to me your doing nothing
What in the world's the matter with you?
Why don't you talk to her, give her some clue

All my dreams now has come true
And I certainly wouldn't want this soon to be through
But if with her you wouln't tell your affection
What then is the use of this beautiful location?

Everytime your with her,
I know you feel a differrent satisfaction
So why don't you go ahead, time is passing, make some obvious action

And now, sadly, years had already passed
But still you haven't done your important task
But I cant believe it, this place, still is here and continuing to last
And you, like before, still wearing your emotional mask

I certainly don't want this story to conclude like this
I want you with her to express your elating bliss
It doesn't matter even if she denies you and this paradise be doomed
What matter's was that you've done what you have to do

But if this is how you want your story to end
Although I don't like it, I can't defy you my friend,
If this paradise you want to be hidden forever
I'll be your guest, i'll live here even if I feel bitter

Tuesday, January 31, 2006


Apat na lugar lang ang tinatambayan ko 'pag wala ko magawa sa bahay: kuwarto, kung hindi natutulog eh nagbabasa; kusina, syempre kumakain; computer shop nina ate sa tabi ng bahay namin; at cyempre sa harap ng TB.

Kaso nga lang medjo matumal na ang sked ko ngayon sa panunuod ng TB. Kaw ba naman ang may kaagaw na 5 y/o na bata, siguradong mahihirapan ka rin manuod. Kung gusto mo mang manuod, kelangan mo pang ilabas ang lahat ng mga inaalikabok mo nang mga pang-uuto. Swertihan na lang kung kakagat ang bata. Magmumukha ka lang "hari-ng-sablay" tuwing mang-uuto ka, kasi siguradong papaltos lahat ng storyang mong napagiwanan na ng panahon. Iba na talaga ang generation ngayon, antatalino na ng mga KIDS! Kahit takutin mo pa la ding epekto.

Kaya eto, wala na kong ibang choice. Kelangan ko nang gamitin ang aking lakas. hahahah..

Hari talaga ko ng sablay, kahit ginamit ko na ang 120% ng lakas ko la pa ding nagawa sa malakas nyang iyak.

Pero sabi nga sa isang kasabihan "if you cant beat them, join them." kaya eto ko ngayon, nanunuod ng Dora the explorer, Blues Clues, Hi-5, Little Bill, Little bear, The backyardigans, Miss spider, Franklin, at sobrang madami pang iba, at (take note) may kasama pang sermon.

Pag di talaga ako makasingit sa TB, natutulog nalang ako. Sa madaling araw nalang ako bumabawi.

Ang dami talagang mga eksena sa telebisyon ang nakakapag pangiti sakin, meron ding nagpapabilib, meron ding nagpapakaba.

eto ang ilan sa mga eksena:


- ang swerte talaga ng mga audience sa OPRAH. wooo... ang mamahal ng mga give-aways! astig! swerte! AT, ang ganda din ng show!

- aba, tinapatan ni Iya ko si Isabael Blaesi ko! gulo ba? Ang ibig sabihin ko eh, ung comercial ni Isabel na shampoo (rejoice ata un) eh tinapatan din ng comercial ni Iya na shampoo din! (palmolive naman, pero di din ako ganung kasigurado) Astig! nagtatapatan ang mga crush ko! hahaha! May kanya-kanya pang mga dance moves! Siguro pareho silang nagpapaimpress sakin! (libre ang mangarap)

- Di ko ganun kagusto si kristine hermosa. Pero dun sa comercial nya, family's brand sardines ata un, sobrang nakyutan talaga ako sa kanya sa first 2 seconds ng comercial na un.

- kung catoons naman ang paguusapan, walang tatalo sa The Simpsons! hahaha! Best cartoon of all time para sakin to. Pinapanuod ko to araw-araw dati, kaso la na ko time ngayon. Pero may nakita akong DVD neto sa recto, baka bili nalang ako nun.

- nabanggit ko nalang din naman ang cartoons, sabihin ko na din ang opinyon ko sa mga kinababaliwan ng kabataan ngayon. Iba na talaga ang trip ng mga kabataan ngayon (parang antanda ko na ah), kung dati di ka IN pag di mo kilala si Shaider, Maskman, Jetman, Mask raider black, Voltes V, Bioman, Power Rangaer, at sobrang madami pang iba. Ngayon naman di ka IN pag di mo kilala ang mga character sa DOTA, di ka din IN pag di ka marunong maglaro ng ragnarok, counterstrike, at lahat ng mga online games. Iba talaga ang nagagawa ng teknolohiya. Pero cyempre madami pa ding mga bata ang medjo OLD-FASHIONED at nanunuod pa rin ng mga cartoons at superheroes katulad ng Naruto.

- Bumilib naman ako sa talino at kakayahan ng tao na sulusyunan ang mga problemang kinakaharap neto. Napanuod ko sa discovery ung pinropose ng isang architectural firm sa japan (Ehem.. arki!). Dahil halos wala ng space para pagtayuan ng mga structures sa susunod na mga henerasyon, nagpropose nga ung sinasabi kong firm ng isang CITY within a BUILDING! WOOOOHOOO!!! Ang luphet! biruin mo isang buong lungsod nasa iisang building lang! Isipin mo nalang ang buong metro manila. Madaming pdeng maging problema ang building nato, katulad ng lindol, sunog, malakas na hangin, bagyo, at madami pa; pero lahat ng problemang to eh nasulusyunan ng mga magagaling na ARKI(ehem) at engineers. Db kakabilib??? Pati ang transportasyon sa loob ng building nasulusyunan din. Naglagay sila ng tren (ung parang LRT) sa loob ng building. For d second time, Db kakabilib??? Sobrang madami pang nakakabilib 'pag nanuod ka ng discovery, pero siguro di ko na sulat dito ung mga un.

- kung nanunuod ako ng discovery cyempre nunuod din ako ng national geographic. Pero ang totoo, medjo mas gusto ko ang discovery. Sayang talaga ung isang documentary study ng NGC, ung documentary nila tungkol sa novel ni Dan Brown na "Da Vinci Code." Sobrang inabangan ko ung program na un, pero sa pinaka sked na ng pagpapalabas neto eh nagkaron ako ng lakad. Inisip ko na mapapanuod ko din un, kasi db madalas magreplay ang mga knowledge channel? Pero hanggang ngayon inaabangan ko parin sa NGC ang replay neto, at hanggang ngayon di ko pa rin eto napapanuod. Baka isipin nyo nanunuod lang ako ng NGC para abangan ung documentary nila sa da vinci code. Madami din naman akong gustong mga program ng NGC pero cyempre mas madami sa discovery. hehe..

- Kung Sitcom naman ang paguusapan, Palibhasa lalake ang nangunguna! Kaso sayang, wala na show na to. Naaaalala ko pa ung mga sobrang nakakatawang mga eksena dun. Tanda nyo pa ba si tikboy(ANJO), na ang papel eh special child?? Nakapanuod pa ko dati ng palibhasa sa cinema one, at talang ganun pa rin, katulad pa rin nung bata ako, kakatawa pa rin. Pero di ko na alam ngayon kung meron pa din nun sa cinema one.

- at kung kulitan at comedy sa comercials naman ang paguusapan, wala namang tatalo dun sa singkit na babae, ung mukhang walang pakialam sa mundo, na sumisigaw ng "BUHAY NA BUHAY ANG PIOLO-JUDAY!"
Sobrang pinapatawa talaga ako ng babaeng un! sana nagbblog cya, tapos mabasa nya etong post ko na to para malaman nya na may napapatawa talaga cya! hehehe...

lam ko dami pa ko mailalagay dito, pero sa ngayon hanggang dito muna. edit ko nalang to sa ibang araw.

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

GO manny!

wooohooo!!! palapit na ng palapit ang laban ng bayan!
parang alam ko na mangyayari ah..
sigurado ko pakakabahin na naman tayo ni manny
siguradong pasisigawin na naman ng laban na'to ang lahat ng mga tatay natin!
siguradong mapapapikit na naman ang lahat ng mga nanay sa bawat tama na tatanggapin ni manny!
siguradong mawawala na naman ang traffic sa EDSA
siguradong aapaw na naman ang mga pusta sa odds
siguradong masaya na naman ang meralco
siguradong madami ang aabsent sa mga trabaho

siguradong madaming masisipag na employees, ung walang pakialam sa laban ni pacman, ang malalate
siguradong tatamarin na namang pumasada ang mga jeep at fx drivers
siguradong titigil "muna" ang problema at bangayan sa pulitika

siguradong titigil din "muna" ang inuman ng mga tambay sa kanto
siguradong mauubos na naman ang LALA fish crackers at popcola sa tindahan malapit samin
dahil sigurado akong buong pinas nakatutuk kay manny!


siguradong mapapapusta na naman ako kay manny neto! hahah!
at siguradong eeksena at eepal na naman ang pangulong GMA paguwi ni manny sa pinas

Langya! kelangan ko pera! manny pupusta ko sayo! galingan mo! waaaa! manalo ka!

Saturday, December 31, 2005

new yr na! may resolution ka ba?

I totally dislike it when someone tells me that "there's no need for a resolution, it is not important, for you can change and improve anytime you want." Well i've got 2 words for you -- TUMAHIMIK KA. hehe..

I believe we all need a new year resolution, eventhough sometimes we think that we dont need one. Sabi nga sa isang famous cliche -- "there's always room for improvement." We all have things we must, if not improve, change and erase.

We always have to improve.

Yes, we can improve and change anytime we want, but it is better for us to know the things we must change, erase and develop just as the new year begins. I think our problem is we just abruptly change when the mistake had already been done.

Try to make a new year resolution. It sounds corny but, I think, it's not. We can just list them in our minds, just keep in mind not to forget them.

For me, im now working out the things I should list in my resolution. It feels good to analyze what you had been this past year and know what I must do to be a better friend, brother and son.

Thursday, December 29, 2005

waahhh gustu ko yun momi!

Legendary band ko ng maituturing ang Eraserheads. Kung baga sa mga amerikano sila ang beatles ko. Isa lang ang naaalala ko tuwing pinapatugtog ko ang mga tugtugin nila -- ang aking kabataan. hahaha... mukhang magiging korny na naman to ah... pero totoo un. Kabataan ko ang naaalala ko, nung elementary plang kasi ako, tanda ko na palagi kaming nagpapayabangan ng mga kaklase ko pagdating sa Eraserheads. Meron nga kong kaklase na kumpleto lahat ang album nila.. kakainggit!! Tapos ako 1 lang album ko noon. Kasi naman medjo mahiyain ako sa parents ko, nung bata pa ko, pagdating sa pagpapabili ng kung anu-ano. Kaya un, ang tanging album ko lang eh ang cuterpillow. huhuhu.. Pero kahit na ganun alam ko naman lahat mga kanta nila. hahaha... Saka dati tandang tanda ko pa na tuwing pupuntahan ng tito ko, college pa s'ya non, ang babaeng nililigawan nya, ang palaging tugtug nun sa koste nya ay syempre Eheads, ang di ko lang msyado maintindihan eh kung bakit nya ko plagi sinasama dati tuwing pupunta sya dun sa nililigawan nya, siguro ang cute cute ko pa noon(hanggang ngayon naman eh! hahahah!) at kaya nya ko siguro sinasama eh para naman gumaan siguro ang pakiramdam nung nililigawan nya( hahahahaha!!!!). Aminado ko medjo ayaw ko ung part dun sa isa nilang album na parang may sumisigaw.. alam nyo un db? Pero ngayon lahat ng nasa loob ng albums nila, kahit na ung mga sumisigaw, ay isang magandang musika sa tenga ko. Ngayong medjo nagkaedad ko nalang ata nabili pa ang iba nilang albums. Ung iba pirated pa! pero cyempre pag nagkakwarta ako bibilhin ko rin ung orig na version. Dami ko kasing gusto bilhin kaya minsan nawawala sa listahan ko ang albums nila.

Nung medyo nag surfing ako sa net, muntik na nga ko malunod sa pagsusurf(hahahaha...), nakita ko na may kakaibang album ngayon ang mga musikerong pinoy. Isang album na alay sa bandang pinakagusto ko. Kung dati nahihiya akong magpabili ng kung anuanong bagay ngayon HINDI na! papabili ko tong album na to sa nanay kO!!!!!! hahahahaha! Ganito ang balak ko(syempre dapat lahat pinaplano muna ng mabuti)-- Kunwari may nakita akong magandang damit para sa momi ko, tapos sasabihin ko sa kanya na "momi lam mo may magandang damit akong nakita dun sa SM, bagay na bagay un sa inyo, uso pa! mura lang un." tapos pag pumayag saka ko na isasagawa ang aking natatagong plano na idaan sya sa kahit anong music store! tapos un na! lalabas na nya credit card nya tapos un! MISSION ACCOMPLISH na naman ang ating secret agent! galing talaga! hahahah.... joke lang.. ako mismo bibili ng album nila. di ko naman ugaling magpabili eh. hehe.. minsan lang pag sobrang wala talaga akong pera. :) sarap kaya ng filing pag kaw ang bumibili ng mga bagay na gusto mo at hindi ka umaasa sa parents mo. Teka, Eheads nga pla ang topic ko d2. mukhang lumalayo ata tayo.

Tatapatin ko kayo ha. Lam nyo eheads lang ata ang tanging pinoy band na di ko pinagsasawaan kahit pinapatugtog ko na sila dati pa. Kaya siguro sobrang gusto ko ang band nila ay siguro dahil sa kanilang mga mensahe na lahat talaga tayo makakarelate.

Medjo nalungkot lang talaga ko nung nadisband sila. Hindi ko pa nga alam hanggang ngayon kung ano ba talaga ang pinaka dahilan ng pagkadisband nila. Kasali ako sa Yahoo! groups ng eheads, dun mo talaga mamimit ang mga SOLID na tagasuporta ng banda. NAKANANG! Sobrang buhay na buhay ang group na un! d natatapos ang mga usapan at mga tanong dun. kaya kung balak mo sumali sa group na un, humanda ka na sa pagbubura ng madaming mga emails "araw-araw" dahil talagang uulanin ka ng mga mail ng group na un!

kakaiba talaga ang tsismis!! kaya ako sumali sa Yahoo! groups ng eheads ay para malaman kung ano ba talaga ang punot dulo ng pagkawala
nila. Pero, sa kabutihang palad, lahat ng sumagot sa tanong kong "bakit nga po pla nadisband ang eheads?" dun sa group ay medjo magkakaiba ang versions. Kaya un hanggang ngayon d ko pa rin talaga alam ang dahilan.

Theme song nga pla ng high school class namin ang kanta nilang "minsan."

Hindi ako ganun kagaling tumugtog ng gitara, limitado lang ang mga chords na alam ko, kaya sa piano ko nalang tinutugtog ang mga kanta nila! SARAP tugtugin ng mga hits nila! mapapapikit ka sa sarap (kung talagang nafifil mo ung sounds hah!) hahahahah!

Tinamaan talaga ako ng kasiyahan nung nalaman kong may alay na album ang mga musikero natin ngayon sa eheads! Sigurado hindi na pirated ang bibilhin ko ngayon!

saludo ako sa bandang Eheads! woohoo!!!

Thursday, December 15, 2005

amateurish poem

Christmas now is nigh
I cant feel it, I wonder why
its spirit seems to subside
in this feeling I now abide
This feeling which seems vile
I hope it leave, I hope it die
for because of it
I feel numb, I feel stupid
As now I come to this age
christmas, I think, is now running out of page
if only I could turn it back to its climax
then, maybe, I could feel the spirit of christmas
Must I now believe
that christmas is just for kids?
because the spirit I once feel
now seems, for me, not to be real
But no! I know christmas has a deep meaning
and its not the cash and new clothes it bring
the kind of christmas I once relish
it sure is fun, but I realize its totally childish
I think the spirit I once felt
is just the excitment money and gifts bring
now I must erase and make it melt
and introduce myself to this new, mature feeling
I'd realized I've been poisoned by vain
and now it caused me much pain
I surely think it wasn't fair
my family, because of me, had had despair
So now I must elevate my perspective
and prepare myself for a new christmas spirit
I ought to forget all worldy and material things
and to my family I must divert all my feelings
So this coming christmas night
ill come home with a different light
ill make everyones spirit bright
so we all could have an unforgettable delight

Sunday, December 11, 2005

absurd question (no.3)

this question was asked to me by a good friend
figuring out this one really gave me a hard time..

if god can make everything, can he make a stone, or something like that, which he cannot break?
need your comments

wala na naman akong magawa...

...kaya eto gumawa nalang ako ng tula
ano? nagulat ka noh?
kala mo d makata isang tulad ko
pampalipas oras ko lang naman to pare
tuloy ka, simple lang aking mensahe
halina't iyo na ngayong simulan
ang pagbasa sa tula kong puuuuro kacornihan
sana chong nakahanda ka na
kasi yan na, sisimulan ko na
pero teka lang, saglit lang kaibigan
meron lang kasi akong simpleng katanungan
alam ko namang magiging madali lang
ang sayo ang pagisip ng kasagutan
sa bagay madali lang naman ang tanong ko
at sigurado akong eto ay masasagot mo
pero sana sa iyong kasagutan
gamitin mo ang iyong katapatan
teka, humahaba na ata intro ko
kaya eto sagutin mo tanong ko
hoy, mahal mo pa ba s'ya?
o teka lang, wag ka muna magtaka
oo seryoso ako eto nga ang tanong ko
at alam kong pagkatapos ng tula ko eto ay sasagutin mo
kasi gimising ka na at iyo ngayong isipin
kung ano ba ang mga bagay na dapat mong unahin
isipin mo sana kung anong nararapat na gawin
upang makatakbo naman s'ya muli ng matulin
kasi naman napagiiwanan na s'ya
kaya sana mag-alay ka ng tulong sa kanya
tulungan mo s'ya sa kanyang pagtakbo patungong kaunlaran
kasi tingnan mo mukhang medjo na s'ya napilayan
alam ko makakahabol din s'ya
kung lahat tayo'y tutulong sa kanya
alam mo, utang mo lang naman lahat sa kanya
kaya sana suklian mo lahat ng biyayang sayo'y binigay nya
teka lang, alam mo na ba kung sino s'ya?
kung hindi pa, pagbigyan mo kong s'yay ipakilala
s'ya lang naman ang lupa mong inanaapakan
oo tama ka, cya ang 'yong inang bayan
o anong ngyari sayo?
mukhang nacocornihan ka na sa mga sinasabi ko
kasi naman nakasimangot ka na at mukhang nababaduyan
sa tula kong tungkol kay inang bayan
oooppss.. teka lang wag mo muna close blog ko
tapusin mo naman sana ang tula ko
kasi naman nung nalaman mong ang tula ko'y tungkol kay inang bayan
bat ganan bigla kang tinamaan ng katamlayan
palibhasa ang "cool" lang sayo'y ang 'yong magarang sasakyan
at wala ka ng ibang inisip kundi ang mall at starbucks mong tambayan
nga pala, nasagot mo na ba ang tanong ko sayo kanina?
kung hindi pa, sana ngayo'y mapagisipan mo na
napansin ko lang kasi wala ka ng pakialam sa kanya
oo alam ko, medjo lubog na kasi ating ekonomiya
pero sana naman damayan natin s'ya sa kanyang problema
kasi alam mo, tayo nalang ata ang kanyang pagasa
mahirap na kasi ngayong ang umasa
sa mga lider nating hangad lang ay pera
hindi ko alam kung meron ba silang konsensya
kasi kung wala, di na ko masusurpresa
mga anak sila ng tipaklong
kelan kaya sila makukulong?
dahil sa kanila madami ang nagugutom
magsikap ka man, la ka pa ring kakainin kundi tutong
wag na siguro nating problemahin ang politika
bahala na ang d'yos at karma sa kanila
alam ko at sigurado kong mahal mo nga s'ya
pero kelangan mo lang talagang buhayin ang 'yong pamilya
naiintindihan kita, kung may balak kang s'yay iwan
mahirap na din kasing makahanap dito ng yaman
pero sana kung sya'y iyong iiwan
at sa ibang sulok ng mundo ika'y makikipagsapalaran
sana naman wag mo s'yang kalilimutan
nandito lang sya maghihintay sya'y yong balikan
ano? naisip mo na ba kung pano mo s'ya matutulungan?
ang payo ko sa'yo isama mo lang s'ya syong dinarasal
sigurado akong dulot nito sa kanya'y malaking kaligayahan
bihira na kasi ngayon ang taong sya ay ipinagdarasal
at para naman sa akin
etong simpleng tula ang alay ko sa bayan natin
uy, salamat nga pla kaibigan
dahil tula ko'y d mo binasura at pinagsawaan
salamat sa yong pagbasa
sa tula kong ngayo'y matatapos na
pagpesensyahan mo nga pla ang pagkaimpormal ng tula ko
hindi naman kasi ako isang makatang seryoso

sana ngayong pagtulog mo
ipagdasal mo muna ang bayan mo
malay mo dahil sa dasal mo mga lider natin ay matauhan na
kaya wag kana magtaka kung bukas bayan natin ay maunlad na

Monday, December 05, 2005


I'd just finish reading memoirs of a geisha, a wonderful novel, last november. Then, i was surprized ,while on the mall, when i saw that memoirs of a geisha would be on philippine cinemas this coming February. ASTIG! cant wait to watch this one! (woohoo!)
ill definitely recommend this movie. <-- url

Saturday, November 26, 2005

absurd question (no.2)

does the past determine the present or does the present determine the past?
need your comments

Friday, November 25, 2005

loveliest thing (kacornihan)

the past, i hope this counts, is the loveliest thing for me. it is in the past where the most essential things, for us to be on exsistence, had taken place. it is in the past where our grandmothers and grandfathers had met, learned to love one another and thus bare a child which we now call as parents. it is also in the past where history repeated itself when this children we call parents had, also, met, loved one another and thus, again, bare a child , which now, i believe, is called by each one of us as "me," in the time trully most important to us, our birth. in my opinion, past is like the hands of a sculptor, it molded and scuplted us to be who we are at present. whoever we are at present, whether a famous personage or a simple somebody or just a nobody, is all because of the past. it is where i, and i know all of us, learned everything-skills needed to survive, emotions developed to interact and knowledge required to understand the world we're livin'.

my love for the past is the reason why i'd always wanted to take up photography. photos, for me, are the windows in which we can view the past. photos bring us back the moments we've once enjoyed in the past, it revives the joy and happiness we'd experience, and it reminds us of the person we once was. everytime i look at them, i feel lucky for having wonderful moments, which will live as long as the picture are there, that im gonna treasure. there's something "mystical", i believe mystical's the right word, i always feel whenever i look at them. i think this mystic feeling is what makes me interested in the past. and you know what? after i had finished looking at pictures, automatically, and seems to me unconciously, i would found myself in a reverie. a reverie which, with the help of my memory and imagination, brings me back to the the moments inside the photographs. photos keep the past perpetual, and aslo defends the past from its nemesis we know as oblivion. i know there are people who hates their pasts, pasts that left them sadness and gloomness. but i know it is this sad and gloomy past that will urge them to suceed. we never know what future has in store for each of us. i think as long as we take care of our present, future would always be kind to us.

we should always take good care of our present, because once we've made something in the present that we'll gonna regret in the future it will remain forever, in us and also in the past. we would suffer ,in the future, the consequences of the mistake we've done. there would and could never be a machine capable of travelling in the past for us to correct the mistakes we've made. because if there would be such thing it must have always exsisted. theres only one flow of everlasting time that would past unto us and we must not waste or ruin it.

i know all of us has treasures buried deep in the past, treasures that cannot be taken from us, treasures only you know where to find, treasures that will remain with you forever(as long as you keep yourself sane :) ) treasures that we'll gonna share to the generations waiting ahead of us. and i know we'll gonna find more treasures on our long journey to the time called "future."

Sunday, November 20, 2005

words to live by

it is not because things are difficult that we do not dare, it is because we do not dare that they are difficult. -SENECA

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

things i should do for me to consider myself sucessful

  • first, of course, finish my studies
  • have nice job and a stable business, to do the things, which needs a lot of money, listed below; hopefully
  • learn the art of photography (thinking this one always excites me)
  • learn a new language
  • have a korean friend
  • go to greece, and buy a mini statue of atlas, the one who, once believed, holds the earth
  • have a good gaze at leonardo's famous painting, mona lisa
  • have a romantic date in venice, dont know yet who my date will be, amanda griffin maybe... hahaha
  • master the piano
  • buy a lexus is300
  • find out how it feels to be a new yorker for about a week or so, depending on how long my money would last
  • get a white water rapids rush, bungee jump and SKYDIVE (whoooohooo....), of course with friends or family
  • build an institution that will help our poor,aged and disabled friends... (my second greatest dream)
  • buy my parents a bmw or benz car,doesn't matter if they already have a car, and a vacation house, haven't yet decided where. i know i can make my parents happy even if i dont buy them this things (sabi nga sa master card "there are things money cant buy"), but if ever im going to have enough money, hopefully and wishfully, im certainly, unhesitatingly gonna buy these things for them. i know my parents had suffered many times for us and i know im not ever gonna have the ability to repay them, having this things for them, im sure, is not enough for what they did. by the way this is my ultimate dream. and i know im gonna do this! (go!go!go!) if ever there are things listed here i haven't achieved, im not going to feel bad as long as i had accomplished this one! believe me (drama na to!)
  • raise a good family, be a good father (strike 2!)
  • explore NEW ZEALAND!! with my own family. i love this country

i know many of my dreams need a lot of money, but if ever im gonna have enough money ill never hesitate doing this things

Sunday, November 13, 2005

George Orwell's 1984

- Inequality is the prize of civilization

This beautiful melancholic novel, cautiously created to warn us of a frightening world we could potentially and possibly become if we dont carefully scrutinize what we are doing, strongly expresses the evil side of man. The lessons and warnings it conveys us is what makes me appreciate this book, and is also what makes this book such a beauty. 1984 expresses hopelessness which, also, makes this book vigourously melancholic. It immerses its readers in a world where reason, intelligence and skepticism are eradicated. A world wherein hope, which is only revealed by those who seek, doesn't really exist. It is the haunting world, i know, we all trully fear to come.
A great way to spend your time.
The concept and the name of endemol's reality show, big brother, was based on this book. (thats what i think)

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Absurd Question

If you're an atheist are you also an agnostic???
Need your comments

Sunday, November 06, 2005

"my favorite celebrity faces"

Local (phil):
Amanda Griffin

Iya Villania
Isabel Blaesi
Vana Garcia
Bianca King
Donita Rose
Maimai Cojuanco


Kate Hudson
Lindsay Lohan
Charlize Theron
Anna Faris
Kelly Hu

Gong Li
Jordana Brewster
Penelope Cruz
Kate Hudson
Liv Tyler
Julia Stiles
Beyonce Knowles
Selma Blair

"I wish my wife-to-be would be a look-alike of one of them. hahah.. what a wish "